Posted on by Ella Campbell

The Significance of Dark Humor While Discussing Trauma, in Myriam Gurbas “Mean”.

In the book “Mean” by Myriam Gurba, one recurring motif is the use of humor as a coping mechanism in the face of trauma and oppression. Gurba uses dark humor throughout the book to address difficult topics like sexual violence and racism often using irony and sarcasm to comment on the absurdity of the situations she finds herself in. It states, “Of Course an elderly white dude taught anthropology. Who better to explain all the cultures and peoples of the world than he who is in charge of them?”.(p.90). By analyzing this motif, we can see how humor can be a powerful tool for marginalized individuals to resist and subvert oppressive systems. Gurba’s humor not only allows her to cope with trauma, but also serves as a way to call out the injustices and hypocrisies of the world around her. In this way, humor becomes a form of resistance, a way for Gurba to reclaim her power in the face of adversity.Furthermore, this motif can also prompt readers to consider the ways in which they use humor to cope with their own struggles and hardships, and whether their use of humor is reinforcing or challenging systems of oppression. Overall, by analyzing this specific motif within “Mean,” we can gain a new perspective on the power of humor as a tool for resistance and self-empowerment. Sexual violence is not just a personal trauma, but a systemic issue perpetuated by societal attitudes towards women and people of color, and that humor can be a powerful tool for coping with trauma and resisting oppression, challenging societal norms and expectations that would have survivors remain silent and ashamed about their experiences.

Overall, Gurba’s writing is characterized by a bold, provocative style that combines humor, imagery, and social critique to explore themes of trauma, identity, and power.Gurba’s use of vivid imagery and sensory details to create powerful, evocative descriptions of people, places, and experiences. Her writing is often visceral and raw, immersing readers in the physical and emotional realities of her own life and those around her. In the text she states, “The hand Macaulay wasn’t molesting me with rose to his snout.”.(p.25). I think that this quote helps us to truly understand the raw realness of her writing and how vulnerable and intense it is. This rawness and dark humour she uses to express her trauma gets through to us on a deep level and helps us to understand the true severity of sexual assault. In addition to these stylistic elements, Gurba’s writing is characterized by a strong social critique, which she uses to expose the contradictions and injustices of society. She is particularly interested in issues of power and oppression, and she uses her personal experiences as a mixed-race Chicana and queer woman to comment on larger social structures and systems.This makes Gurba’s writing is a bold and unapologetic exploration of the intersections of trauma, identity, and power. Through her use of humor, imagery, and social critique, she invites readers to engage with these themes in a deeply personal and often challenging way, challenging us to rethink our assumptions and to confront the injustices of the world around us. One of the ways Gurba uses her bold writing style is by being unapologetically honest and straightforward in her descriptions of traumatic experiences. She does not shy away from using explicit language or graphic descriptions, and often includes details that might make some readers uncomfortable. However, this approach allows Gurba to paint a vivid and realistic picture of the pain and trauma she has experienced, while also drawing attention to the ways in which these experiences are often silenced or ignored.

Another way Gurba uses her bold writing style is by employing irony and humor to highlight the absurdity of societal norms and expectations. Through her writing, she often challenges readers to re-examine their own assumptions and biases, while also shining a light on the ways in which these norms can be harmful and oppressive.Overall, Gurba uses her bold writing style to create a unique and powerful reading experience that is both deeply personal and politically engaged. Through her use of humor, vivid imagery, and unflinching honesty, she encourages readers to confront uncomfortable truths about themselves and the world around them, while also offering a message of hope and resilience in the face of trauma and oppression. I was often very surprised by the intense and explicit language that Gurba used throughout the book but I also admire her brutal honesty and rawness because it shows the seriousness of the situations and helps us to understand that she isn’t going to sugarcoat anything about these traumatic events because the more real it is the more we are able to realize how important and traumatic this was.

One significant pattern that develops throughout “Mean” by Myriam Gurba is the theme of the erasure of queer and non-white perspectives in dominant narratives and histories. Gurba uses her own experiences as a queer Chicana to illustrate the ways in which dominant narratives and histories exclude or minimize the experiences and perspectives of marginalized groups. This theme is first introduced in Gurba’s discussion of the murder of Sophia Torres, a Chicana teenager who was killed and raped. Gurba notes that the media coverage of Torres’ murder focused on the perpetrator rather than the victim, erasing Torres’ identity and her experiences as a Chicana. Throughout the text, Gurba continues to critique the erasure of marginalized perspectives in dominant narratives, from the erasure of queer identities in the history of the Catholic Church to the erasure of Chicana perspectives in the portrayal of the Mexican American War. Gurba’s use of humor and intertextuality allows her to challenge these dominant narratives and reclaim space for marginalized perspectives. This pattern is significant because it highlights the importance of centering marginalized perspectives in our understanding of history and society. By critiquing the erasure of queer and non-white perspectives in dominant narratives, Gurba challenges us to interrogate our own biases and work towards a more inclusive and equitable society.

Discussion Questions

1.How does Gurba’s identity as a queer, mixed-race Chicana inform her experiences of racism and homophobia within her community? How do these experiences shape her understanding of her own identity and sense of belonging?

2.How does Gurba’s experience of sexual assault shape her relationship to her community and her sense of justice? How can we work to create a culture that supports survivors and holds perpetrators accountable, even within communities that are already marginalized?

Citation

Gurba, Myriam. Mean. Coffee House Press, 2017

17 Replies to “The Significance of Dark Humor While Discussing Trauma, in Myriam Gurbas “Mean”.”

  1. Hi Ella, this was a great blog post! You pointed out the dark humor that the author creates for the character to portray. When talking about this, since the character Gurda has been experiencing trauma, she uses the dark and raw humor to get the readers to have an understanding of what she is going through. The way Gurda shows herself can be very mean towards others which makes me wonder if by being mean to others helps her live though the trauma that she has once experienced. “Eat your food. Dad told her. Don’t play with it. One time my sister wouldn’t eat her eggs, and my father smashed her face right into them. She stopped fooling around after that.” (50). When reading this part of the chapter, she describes this experience to seem like it was a normal occurrence that would happen in their household. This also makes me think that this was the start of all the trauma that she would be starting to go through and this is why she would grow up to have such dark humor. Sometimes for people, making dark humor based on past experiences helps them cope with what had happened to them in the past. Overall, reading your blog post the readers can see the dark humor that Gurda shows when talking about her past trauma.

    1. Good job with this comment, Brooke! Just make sure all quotes are introduced:

      Gurba writes, “Eat your food. Dad told her. Don’t play with it. One time my sister wouldn’t eat her eggs, and my father smashed her face right into them. She stopped fooling around after that.” (50).

      Also don’t forget to proofread! The author’s last name is Gurba.

      Score: 3.5/5

  2. Hi Ella, I thought your blog post was great! I loved that you decided to further explore the use of dark humor in this book because I believe that is significantly important to the overall story. I also love how you asked about Gurba’s identity and how her experiences shaped her because I thought a large theme in the sections of the book that we have read so far have been about Gurba exploring and finding her sense of self. One example that stuck out to me was when Gurba was still in high school and was feeling a sense of guilt about the privileges she has. She says “these were the Mexicans whose kids Dad made educational materials for, and there I was, riding up the freeway with drugs, multicultural friends, and candy. I felt bad that I was mostly Mexican but didn’t have to be out there doing that, ruining my body so people could have strawberries to eat” (Gurba 45). The reason that this particular quote stuck out to me is because she seems to be having conflict within herself about her identity. In many aspects of her life she is the minority, her race, her gender, her sexual orientation, and she still takes the time to explain how she is privileged. I feel that this says a lot about the kind of person that Gurba is and the way that her parents raised her to have empathy for others, even if she spends a lot of her time trying to be mean.

    1. Hi Ella!
      To start off, I loved how you veered away from talking about oppression and trauma and focused your blog post on how the author wanted us to see that everyone copes with said trauma in a different way. This compared to “A Raisin in the Sun” where the family lived within a world, almost like a bubble, where they didn’t like to acknowledge the oppression they faced. This then suffocated them into turning them against each other in some situations. The common theme is that they both deal with this negativity in a different way.
      My take on the use of dark humor is Gurba being able to disarm the reader and challenge our assumptions and beliefs about these difficult topics.” I like to start with rape because it’s a word I hear and use a lot. Rape is a popular crime.” (Gurba 47) You used the word “sugarcoat” when it comes to Gurba using dark humor. You have to allow someone to soak in the worst of a situation to be able to embrace that these situations are real and they can happen to someone. Whether it’s sexual violence, oppression, or racism. For example, you spoke about the murder of Sophia Torress. That is an example of marginalized groups not recognizing each other’s trauma and looking at oppression from one angle but should really be seen from none other, than the victim’s angle. Your second discussion question relates to this point in that Gurba’s experience of sexual assault led her to question the justice system and its ability to hold perpetrators accountable. She was disappointed by the lack of support and resources available to survivors of sexual violence and the way in which the justice system often prioritizes the rights of the accused over the needs of survivors. We should work to first acknowledge the prevalence of sexual violence and its impact on individuals and communities. This means working to disarm the stigma and shame that often surrounds discussions of sexual violence.
      Gurba is acknowledging the shock value of saying the word and the discomfort it may cause the reader. She then goes on to explain that rape is a word she hears and uses a lot, highlighting the prevalence of sexual violence in society. It is so easy to turn our backs on someone that tries to make light out of something as serious as sexual assault, which is one of the themes in this book, but its also a way to confront the discomfort and awkwardness that often surrounds discussions of trauma. Your first paragraph sparked a thought in my head about dark humor and why people do it. By using humor, she is able to acknowledge the discomfort and create a more relaxed and open atmosphere for discussion. If you think about it, it’s so much easier to join in on a funny conversation where people are filling up the space of time with laughter than a conversation that involves long pauses and awkward trauma bond stories. This allows for a more inclusive conversation, where everyone is able to participate and contribute, regardless of their own experiences. But we can’t not acknowledge that Gurba does this for a reason. It’s not all about jokes and covering up your trauma with a couple of jokes because in the end these issues are extremely difficult to cope with when it comes down to it.

      1. Wow, Deanna, you’ve provided so many sharp insights in this comment! Here are a few of my favorites:

        – The idea that humor can “disarm the reader.”
        – “Gurba’s experience of sexual assault led her to question the justice system and its ability to hold perpetrators accountable”
        – “We should work to first acknowledge the prevalence of sexual violence and its impact on individuals and communities. This means working to disarm the stigma and shame that often surrounds discussions of sexual violence.”
        – “By using humor, she is able to acknowledge the discomfort and create a more relaxed and open atmosphere for discussion.”

        Just make sure that all quotes are introduced:

        Gurba writes, “I like to start with rape because it’s a word I hear and use a lot. Rape is a popular crime” (47).

        Keep up the great work!

        Score: 4/5

  3. Hi Ella, I thought you had an excellent blog post! Your second discussion question was very thought-provoking. At a young age, Gurba experienced being sexually assaulted by her classmate. When you’re in school, you are supposed to feel safe. Unfortunately, Gurba was being assaulted in her classroom in front of her teacher, who noticed but chose to ignore what was happening. Later, we find out that Gurba’s abuser, Macaulay, was also being abused by his baseball coach Mr. Osmond. Gurba says, “If molestation is a circle, a circle of life, then isn’t the hand of every molester working through the hand of every other molester?” (Gurba 47). Gurba is trying to explain the cycle of abuse. What Macaulay did was horrific and unspeakable, but unfortunately, he was also experiencing the same thing, thus turning him into an abuser as well. Macaulay was being abused by his baseball coach, who was also a lawyer, a father, and a husband. Mr. Osmond created a false persona and way of living to cover up what he was doing this whole time, creating a confusing outlook on the community for Gurba. Gurba says, “My heart refused to have compassion for those involved in our local chomo mess. Compassion is too risky” (Gurba 47). Many would feel terrible for what happened to Macaulay, but Gurba struggles to find her compassion because he assaulted her too. She sees Macaulay getting justice for what happened to him, but what about her? Her teacher saw what was happening to her, and he stayed silent. Teachers are mandated reporters, but he went on to grade papers instead. No one was there to protect Gurba, and now she has a warped view of justice because nobody ever fought for her.

    1. Wow, this is a super insightful comment, Charlotte! It’s interesting to consider, too, that Gurba went on to become a teacher, given her experience with teachers like “Mr. Hand” (we could also consider what’s at stake in that pseudonym).

      Score: 5/5

  4. Hello Ella! I find it interesting that you grasped onto this use of dark humor as a coping mechanism. I personally feel dark humor is used as a gateway to engage with readers about hard to talk about topics. I notice that this occurs a lot within our society. There is a strong presence of darkness and humans tend to beat around the bush, disguising reality through humorous remarks. Leaders use the mechanism of humor to get a group of people on their side and it is effective. In this book I feel humor is used in a similar sense. If topics such as sexual violence and racism were spoken about in the literal sense, many may not continue reading or feel uncomfortable sharing that context with a classroom of students. I noticed the suggestion for the kind of person that would typically get sexually assaulted, “California wants everyone to take her top off and jump in” (45). The scene in which this quote is from is acknowledging how none of the characters are paying attention to the beauty of California’s pacific ocean.California is being described as attention seeking and easy to get (sleep with), so no one cares to sleep with them. This indicates that those who are more conservative with their body are those who are more likely to experience sexual violence. The humorous expression of California wanting everyone to take its top off is covering up the conceptual reality of what type of person is more likely tp experience rape in our society. I do agree that Gurba challenges his readers to internally analyze their own values and experiences with these controversial, intense issues, and the literary device used to engage readers in this book as well as in reality when speaking about controversial issues is indeed dark humor.

    1. Great job unpacking the image of California, Cassidy! I’m not sure, though, whether there is evidence in the text to support this claim:
      “This indicates that those who are more conservative with their body are those who are more likely to experience sexual violence.” I think we would need hard data to support such a point, which goes beyond the scope of the book.

      Score: 5/5

  5. Hey Ella! I 100% agree with you when you stated “Her writing is often visceral and raw, immersing readers in the physical and emotional realities of her own life and those around her”, though at times she fuses such acts as sexual assault and molestation with a joke, or random objects or words that doesn’t really come to mind when you think of such acts, just to get her statement across, it gives the readers a look into her mind and her past, yet not to the point where we are “privy” to everything that went down in her life. At the beginning of the chapter ‘Cuban Interlude’, she stated, “That’s the story of my avant-garde molestation” (88), she describes her molestation as an experimental work of art, and then goes on to explain why she calls it that, due to the fact that molestation is usually associated with, in American terms, when someone is molested by a grown-up, not a peer, not in broad daylight with he acknowledgement of a history teacher. Her idea of fusing these raw actions with these thoughts gives the readers the idea of the physical and emotional realities of her own life and those around her as you stated earlier, with a bit of humor aswell.

    1. Great analysis of that unusual phrase “avant-garde molestation,” Michelle! Just make sure to proofread your writing, keeping an eye out for run-on sentences and typos.

      Here’s one example of a run-on sentence that would be easier to read if broken down into two or three:

      “I 100% agree with you when you stated “Her writing is often visceral and raw, immersing readers in the physical and emotional realities of her own life and those around her”, though at times she fuses such acts as sexual assault and molestation with a joke, or random objects or words that doesn’t really come to mind when you think of such acts, just to get her statement across, it gives the readers a look into her mind and her past, yet not to the point where we are “privy” to everything that went down in her life.”

      Score: 4/5

  6. Hi Ella, I really love your blog post! I think that talking about her ways of coping is just as important as the trauma Gurba experiences. I think this book is a great example of how trauma impacts everyone differently and there is no one size fits all approach to it. I notice that a lot of her frustration and anguish develop into feelings of anger. An example I saw of this was, “I spent the summer before I left peeing in a Mexican desert and trying not to strangle Christians” (Gurba 69). Gurba as a narrator of her memoir uses humor and hyperbolic expressions and that is one example to fortify it. I think this also feeds back to the adolescent ways of handling difficult situations. As children, we do not have all the tools to handle things “correctly” which can explain why she acts the way the does.

  7. Comment redo: Hi Ella, this was a great blog post! You pointed out the dark humor that the author creates for the character to portray. When discussing this, the character Gurba has been experiencing trauma, she uses the dark and raw humor to get the readers to have an understanding of what she is going through. The way Gurba shows herself can be very mean towards others which makes me wonder if by being mean to others, it helps her live though the trauma that she has once experienced. Gurba says “Eat your food. Dad told her. Don’t play with it. One time my sister wouldn’t eat her eggs, and my father smashed her face right into them. She stopped fooling around after that.” (50). When reading this part of the chapter, she describes this experience to seem like it was a normal occurrence that would happen in their household. This also makes me think that this was the start of all the trauma that she would be starting to go through and this is why she would grow up to have such dark humor. Some people make dark humor comments or remarks based on past experiences which helps them cope with what had happened to them in the past. Overall, reading your blog post the readers can see the dark humor that Gurba shows when talking about her past trauma.

  8. Hi Ella, I really enjoyed reading your blog post. I agree with you and how she continuously used humor to cope with her trauma.
    To answer your second discussion question, I feel as though Gurba’s experience made her realize that people who are minorities have less of a voice in her community. I believe that it shed light on the ways in which sexual assault and harassment are often overlooked or dismissed, where the perpetrators may hold positions of power or privilege, such as being white. An example of this is when Grub shares the story of Mr. Osmond, “The news said his church had known what he was up to for a while because boys had told him, but instead of kicking him out, his bishop had gotten him therapy” (Gruba, 47). This quote proved that there is a lack of consequences for people who sexually assault others, information was known about Mr. Osmond and how he was a predator however justice wasn’t served. This can make it difficult for survivors to come forward and seek justice, as they may fear retribution or further marginalization.
    To create a culture that supports survivors and holds perpetrators accountable, it is important to acknowledge and address the ways in which power dynamics and systems of oppression intersect with sexual violence. This includes creating safe and supportive spaces for survivors to come forward, educating community members about consent and healthy relationships, and challenging harmful cultural norms and attitudes that perpetuate sexual violence. It is crucial to hold perpetrators accountable for their actions, regardless of their position within the community of their race or ethnicity. This requires a shift in cultural attitudes towards sexual violence and a commitment to actively dismantle systems of oppression that allow perpetrators to go unchecked. Creating a culture that supports survivors and holds perpetrators accountable requires a collective effort from all members of the community. This includes survivors, allies, and those who may have perpetuated harmful behaviors in the past. By working together to address the root causes of sexual violence and creating a culture of accountability and support, we can help to ensure that all members of our communities can live free from the trauma of sexual assault.

    Citation:
    Gurba, Myriam. Mean. Coffee House Press, 2017.

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