Throughout this segment of Mean by Myriam Gurba, readers are brought into the narrator’s life more deeply through personal experiences that shape the way she sees the world. In this noteworthy portion of the book, we are introduced to the highly prevalent theme of mental health in regard to society and her sexual assault. Through Gurba’s retelling of her own rape encounter and the numerous ways it haunts her presently, we are able to see the persistent effects mental health can have on a person.
The harmful impacts of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) are implicated as Gurba explains the explicit and appalling details of her own rape. As per the fifth edition of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5), PTSD is defined as “Intense or prolonged psychological distress at exposure to internal or external cues that symbolize or resemble an aspect of the traumatic event(s)”. It is apparent that Gurba is suffering from this, not only because straightforwardly she states so, but because of the gutwrenching side effects that continue long after her assault. She states, “Did you know PTSD is the only mental illness you can give someone? A person gave it to me. A man actually drove me crazy. He transmitted this condition” (Gurba 109). I find this quote very intriguing because her diction makes it seem as if mental disorders are something communicable such as the flu or measles, however, it is quite the opposite. Through her experiences, she developed this dreadful disorder that she carries around with her and she blames her abuser for transmitting the disease even though that is not technically feasible.
Another example of this is when Gurba is grocery shopping with her mother and she sees a man who has a similar appearance to the individual who raped her. She has an intense wave of anxiety come over her which makes her feel as if she is no longer in her own body. This can also represent the way that after an assault, it is not uncommon for one to feel detached from their physical being due to the violation. She claims, “I came back to my body almost as immediately as I’d left it when I realized the shopper was not him. His was not the smile I still felt between my legs” (Gurba 125). Even the slight semblance of the man who raped her can have a strong influence on her, causing her to feel uneasy and even dissociated in an everyday setting. She follows these statements by proclaiming, “This shopper was some random homey, but for a sesame seed of a second, my mind transposed that face over this homeboy’s face. It blended them into one composite. The post-traumatic mind has an advanced set of art skills” (Gurba 125). Something that drew me into this was the way that the event was so disturbing that her mind plays tricks on her when faced with strangers whose faces she has never seen before in casual contexts. Then again, it is pivotal to remember that when she was assaulted it was unexpected and in a context such as the one she was in with her mother at the store. The fear and blindsides forced her brain to go into panic mode and a frenzy, not only because of the event that scarred her but because of the disease that it created.
A plot moment that was especially fascinating was when Gurba was speaking with the nurse in complete fear and disbelief to which she was hit with disrespect as well as a lack of sympathy and support. She was invalidated by someone whose job is to help her by being told “‘You’re going to have to get over this’” and “‘These kinds of things happen’” (Gurba 122). Sexual assault is not something to be taken lightly especially since it is a criminal offense and demolishes the mental state of the victim. This was very counterproductive for Gurba since she was already rattled by what happened to her. It is also crucial to understand that for people suffering from PTSD, it is not as simple as being told to “get over” the damage, and that offering insightful support is much more beneficial than negativity. I find the nurse’s approach baffling, principally for the fact that she is also a woman and is highly susceptible, unfortunately, to endure the same issues that Gurba did. Though it is something that happens all too common in society, it is not an issue to be brushed under the rug and played off as if it were nothing.
This segment of the novel was interesting because we are shown the new and more intricate ways that Gurba handles trauma. When she was younger and was touched by her male classmate, she sat back anxiously and allowed it to happen. Now as an adult, she fought back against her abuser and did what she could to prevent it from happening again. She is no longer handling these difficult situations with childish immaturity but with a more sophisticated, thought-out approach and with a sense of impulsivity. Though she is plagued with lasting trauma and mental tumult, she has grown as a narrator as we learn more about her experiences and navigation through coping. The readers can see the good, bad, and ugly as she has to handle the ups and downs of these horrible circumstances but as our protagonist, we are able to recognize the growth and maturity she obtains.
Discussion Questions
- Do you think the advice the nurse gave Gurba was helpful or harmful? If you feel it is harmful, what could have been a more efficient or respectful approach that could’ve been taken?
- What are some ways Gurba reacts to sexual assault in school with Macaulay to now in college? How are her approaches similar? How do they differ?
Works Cited
“Understanding the Impact of Trauma – Trauma-Informed Care in Behavioral …” National Library of Medicine, 2013, https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK207191/.
Gurba, Myriam. Mean, Coffee House Press, La Vergne, TN, 2017, pp. 101–144.
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Hi Lauren, I thought your blog post was amazing. I think you did a great job of highlighting the mental health affects due to sexual assault that were discussed in the book. I also loved that you brought in outside information to define PTSD for us because it plays such a large role in Gurba’s life and the book as well. One particular line from the text that also explores Gurba’s PTSD is “when you have PTSD, things repeat themselves over and over and over. Guilt is a ghost. Guilt is a ghost. Guilt is a ghost” (Gurba 116). I felt that this quote was so powerful because it is telling in a variety of ways. She could be telling us that she feels haunted by her rape, or she feels haunted by the guilt she experiences since she did not die from her rape like Sophia did. She also is saying that things repeat themselves over and over again for her when reliving the sexual assault and she then repeats the sentence about guilt being a ghost over and over again. We know that Gurba is experiencing PTSD from her rape and in this small section of the book it feels like she is inviting us to see how prevalent and detrimental PTSD can be by using repetition.
Hi Lauren, you did a great job on your blog post! You made good points on how mental health and sexual assaults both have an impact on each other which can lead to a greater deal in their life. When bringing up PTSD into this mix in Gurdas life, you can see how the character is going through an internal battle with herself and how she copes with all the trauma that she has gone through. By Gurda seeing the littlest thing that could remind her of someone who raped or sexually assaulted her, it reminds her of how she felt at that exact moment and she gets triggered by it. “He is a he and he is everywhere. He is in the sky. He is in the birds. He is in the grass. He is in you. Whether you like it or not, he is in you.”(mean,110). When reading this part of the book, you can tell by the characters’ expressions through what she is saying that everything reminds her of her past. This just shows how much these sexual assaults have an impact on people and that it takes many years to get cope with something that awful.
Hi Lauren, you did a great job and I loved how you were able to make the important connection between sexual assault and ptsd. I think it is so important that you were able to recognize the way she reacted in regard to the assault now vs how she acted when she was younger because it shows a growth in character, and it shows her becoming stronger within herself and not allowing this to be pushed under the rug like her prior assault was. I think that the advice the nurse gave Gurba was extremely harmful and hurtful. This type of response can make a survivor feel like their feelings and trauma are not valid or important and can contribute to feelings of shame and self-blame. Instead, it is important for medical professionals to acknowledge the severity of sexual assault and provide resources for survivors to receive appropriate support and care. They should also validate the survivor’s feelings and experience, and make sure they understand that they are not at fault for what happened. If I were advising Gurba in this situation, I would encourage her to seek out support from trained professionals, such as a therapist or counselor, who specialize in working with survivors of sexual assault. In the book it states, “Numbness replaced the volcano I’d been seconds before.”.(Gurba 122). This quote from the story helps us to realize the true harm that this conversation with the nurse had on Gurba which ultimately caused her to go into a dissociative state and caused more harm than good.
Excellent job with this comment, Ella! Your interpretation of that quote is super insightful.
Score: 5/5
Hi Lauren, I really enjoy your analysis of this section of the book and bringing awareness to mental health. Mental health especially to me is a very important topic that a lot of people struggle with. There is a bunch of different triggers of mental health and levels of severity. In Gurba’s case she is dealing with a severe cause of her mental health disorder that can be very difficult to move past and is completely understandable. Additionally, I agree that the advice the nurse gave her was very harmful and inconsiderate. Sexual assault is not something to take lightly and should not be normalized in any way. The nurse saying “These kinds of things happen” (Gurba 112) is exactly what not to do in a situation like this. This women has endured so much from this assault and disregarding her feelings and trying to normalize them can not only be a trigger but a set back in her journey of recovery. As we can see Gurba has a hard time dealing with the situation as it is because when speaking of it she proclaims it was transmitted to her which we know is not possible. “Did you know PTSD is the only mental illness you can give someone? A person gave it to me. A man actually drove me crazy. He transmitted this condition” (Gurba 101). In this case she shows her thought process and how her mental illness is not only effecting her health but her way to think logically and be sane. The nurse just makes the whole situation so much worse and should have comforted her or said nothing at all. Instead of helping her through this tough time the nurse makes her feeling invalidated and she is part of the problem of why rape is so common and normalized these days.
Hey Lauren, I really enjoyed your blog post and reading the comparison between sexual assault and PTSD. Mental health and PTSD can be given off from tragedy’s like sexual assault and rape. This is proven from Gurba, She suffers from both of these and probably never experienced this before she was assaulted. “Did you know PTSD is the only mental illness you can give someone? A person gave it to me. A man actually drove me crazy. He transmitted this condition” (Gurba 101). This quote from the book proves that it can be given off and this is something many people obtain from others and shouldn’t deserve to suffer from this. To answer your question I believe the advice the nurse gave was harmful because she was kind off nonchalant about it and kind of normalized sexual assault.
Hey Lauren, you did a great job on your blog post. I enjoyed your idea of writing all about PTSD, going through something such as sexual assault can leave someone with PTSD.
To answer your second discussion question, I think Gruba acted differently in school to her sexual assault with Mr. Macaulay compared to now in college. She initially keeps the assault to herself because she fears no one will believe her, but eventually tries to reach out to an adult for told and is urged to keep quiet. She struggles with feelings of shame and isolation, and she blames herself for the assault. Some adults make her feel as though her feelings are invalid when she spoke to the school nurse who said “These kinds of things happen. You’re going to have to get over this” (Gurba, 122), this is an example of how victims are urged to stay quiet.
In college she becomes involved in activism around sexual assault on college campuses, attending rallies and writing articles on the subject. Gurba eventually becomes more vocal about her experiences with sexual assault and shares her story publicly through her writing and speeches, she stops fearing the judgment of others and fears of people not believing her story. Gurba’s approaches are similar yet different, they are similar due to the fact that she still feels shame after the assault, she also wrote about the assault as a way to process her emotions and experiences. The ways that Gurba’s approaches differ is that in college she becomes more involved in speaking out against sexual assault, instead of keeping it to herself.
Citation:
Gurba, Myriam. Mean. Coffee House Press, 2017.